This will not be a well-formed post. I will not take the time to elaborate nor design an appealing layout. No, this post is a quick and dirty rant about condescension towards men who don't put up with sexism. In fact, that attitude has become so common that I feel it deserves an "ism" of its own...how about, "sirdoucheism"? Yes, sirdoucheism will do just fine.

You see, women are human. I know, I know, it's hard to believe, so I'll give you all a moment to compose yourselves after the shock. But science confirms it: women are, in fact, the same species as men, and their intellect, personalities, desires, tastes, and every other aspect of their identities are as diverse and varied as those of men. SHOCK AND AWE. So while most women are sexual creatures, just as most men are, they are NOT sexual objects. They are much more complex and multifaceted than a hot body. If you think a woman is attractive, that's great! In fact, if you tell a woman how beautiful and attractive she is, politely, I'm sure she'd appreciate it. But there's a polite and complimentary way to do it, and a...well, a douchey way to do it.

Saying "you have beautiful eyes" or "you're very attractive" or "you look great in that dress"—all compliments. On the other hand, saying "nice tits" or "I'd hit that" or "I want to fuck you right in the pussy" is just rude (also, using memes in your come-ons is just lame). Here are some basic rules of thumb: 1) If you're complimenting a sexual body part, like her butt, breasts, or vagina, you're probably not being polite. Don't get me wrong, there are careful ways of doing so without being sleezy, but...it's not likely you're doing it right. 2) If you're trying to compliment a woman using sexual slang, you're probably doing it wrong. 3) If your compliments are based entirely on sexual desire or fantasies, and you don't feel any appreciation for them beyond sex, you're probably doing it wrong.

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Now, what I've described above is bad, but there's something far worse: victim blaming. This goes for rape as well as harassment of any kind. When a woman is raped, she was NEVER "asking for it". It was NEVER her fault for wearing the clothes she liked, or for having sex with more than the arbitrary threshold number of partners you've decided upon. The ONLY time a woman is asking for sex...is when she's literally asking for sex. If it's rape, then she NEVER asked for it. Period, full stop. There's a more subtle point to be made here as well: a woman's body is not an object for male pleasure. If a woman takes a nude photo either for herself or for a partner, that is private. It is NOT OKAY to put that photo online without her permission. And if it ends up online (for example, because she's not tech-savvy and doesn't realize that iCloud puts it online for her), it is NOT OKAY to distribute it without permission. The excuse "well, if she didn't want everyone to see her naked body, she shouldn't have taken nude photos" is BULLSHIT. That's the analogue of saying "well, if you didn't want to get into a car crash with that other drunk driver, you shouldn't have driven your car at all". Everyone has EVERY right to take photos of themselves, in any amount of clothing, and to have those photos be private. And that fact that the media (well, TMZ) is paying for those photos...that's sickening.

And when a woman cosplays as one of her favorite characters, it is NOT okay to immediately assume "she's female, so she's being fake and trying to be slutty". It is NOT okay to watch an entire video about the wonders of Comic-Con and then see 90% of the comments are, "Nice tits, Wonder Woman. I'd motorboat them." THESE ARE NOT OKAY. A woman is not on Earth for your horny, 12-year-old brain to get off. If you want to do that, find a girlfriend who's okay with it or watch porn. Otherwise, you're looking at a real, living human who's not trying to do anything but be herself, and you immediately think of her as a bedroom accessory.

So now I've explained the sexism, but that's not the sirdoucheism. Sirdouchesim comes when a male decides that sexism is not okay. When a man stands up for women, and maybe even declares himself a feminist because fuck those who think women are one-dimensional, frail, sex toys for cooking meals. You know, when a man decides to treat women like human beings. And then, inevitably (at least on the internet), SOME Sir Douche will come along and say, "Don't be a white knight for her. She's not going to fuck you." Condescension for treating someone like a human? Apparently, that's just a common thing now...and it shouldn't be. And the all-too-frequent implication that the MAIN REASON I or any other man would stand up for women's rights is because we want to have sex with them? How fucked up is that? That thought process is beyond ill. Do you realize how manipulative that would make us? "Women aren't sexual objects! They're human! Treat them equally! ..... now will you let me fuck you in the ass?" How can anyone think that thought process is okay or the default male concept? I sense much projection in these cases. YOU are unable to see an attractive woman as much more than boobs and vaginas and asses on legs, so you assume ALL men must think the same way. And the only way YOU can rationalize "pretending" women are more than that is if you assume it's all a ploy to get them into bed by appealing to their "feminine ideals".

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You know what makes someone a white knight? Riding in on horseback to rescue a woman in distress. You know what DOESN'T make someone a white knight? Being a decent human being and realizing that women have brains, with limbic systems and frontal lobes fully intact, and aren't just sex organs attached to pleasure-bots.

So here's the conclusion of this rant. To all the Sir Douches out there (and you know who you are): fuck you. You are disgusting, cruel, manipulative, ignorant bastards, and one day I hope you all grow the fuck up and stop being a 20+ year old preteen. And if you ever get a girlfriend, I hope you don't treat her the way you talk about women...because if you do, I just feel so much pity for her.